Fourth Week - Why Didn't This Exist Already?

The more I continue with this exercise, the more I realize I should have started years ago. We complain about some of these things all the time. Things that weren't problems when the English language was developed. They're probably first world problems now but they deserve a spot in our vocabulary all the same!

Day 22

Flought; (noun) [flout]

A person sitting next to you or near you on an airplane who contributes to making the flying experience far less than comfortable. Such as a stinky man or a wailing baby.

  • My 25 hour flight back to India sucked because I got a window seat next to two floughts; the crying AND the stinky kind!
  • I hope you aren't surrounded by too many floughts on this flight.


Day 23

Caedonis; (noun) [kay-doh-niss]

The irrational fear of falling backwards.

  • Alex's caedonis never lets her sit comfortably on a fence.
  • Caedonistic people tend to avoid rooftops.


Day 24

Mistern; (noun) [miss-turn]

An item or product that is usually never used until the end of its life or until it is over. It is not a planned phenomenon.

  • Always borrow a mistern, never buy one.
  • I always think stationary will not be a mistern and buy it because I can't control myself.


Day 25

Virtuationship; (noun) [vur-tchu-ay-shun-ship]

A relationship you maintain with a person through any medium besides real life (read face-to-face.)

  • She met GT at a bar and they've been in a virtuationship ever since.
  • I prefer virtuationships because it's easier to be honest. Sucks when you're horny though.


Day 26

Squiddly; (noun) [skwid-illy]

The realization that when you put the universe or even just our world in perspective, you are a tiny and mostly insignificant part of it.

  • Tanvi had been having a low day full of squiddly thoughts.
  • The purpose of life is to go out not feeling squiddly.


Day 27

Kauker; (noun) [kaw-ker]

A person with a terrible sense of humour. They can be inappropriate, unfunny or often misunderstood.

  • Jared is the kawker of our class because I can never tell if he's actually joking or just being an asshole.


Day 28

Starcasm; (noun) [star-kaz-um]

When a person attempts to be sarcastic but it always sounds like they're being serious and mean what they're saying.

  • I can't tell you if any of Tejas's stories are true because they always sound starcastic to me.